Purple Fly Community

This would be the last post for 2007, before I start, I would like to take this opportunity to thanks all readers of purplefly community, without you guys, there’s no purplefly community, also thanks to those who had taken their precious time to comment on purpelfly community. I really appreciate a lot. I wish all of you have a properous HAPPY NEW YEAR 2008.

Recently I met a friend, he use to visit to my blog. Thankfully, he says some of my post has changed his views towards his own perception on relationship, which I am happy about as the purpose of this blog is to share view on relationship between men and women. Back to his story, he told me that he do not know how to love again, I am quite surprised to heard that, he has been into 4 relationships, he felt that he can’t understand women, no matter how hard he tried to pleased, fix, give in and care. He still end up broken heart. After taken a moment to listen to his story as I am not going to details it in here as it was too long. His story is long but it’s simple, I tell him “Wrong Timing, Wrong Woman”. Unfortunately, all the woman he met obviously require a totally different tact, furthermore all the woman he met are in their early 20’s not looking to settle down, these woman has just commenced on their journey in life where these women gets a good mix of what life has to offer (not all, much depends on maturity state of the woman itself). Since he’s in a reasonable age to settle down and are actively looking to do so, I tell him all the woman she met in his relationship is clearly a mismatch from the outset. He and these woman have different expectation in different stages of their life. He met them in wrong phases of life. I wishfully hope that this could clearly state why all his relationship kept failing.

If you are one of the many who have tried so hard in a relationship and going no where. Rather than criticising yourself exhaustively, why don’t you just get a grip that not everything in life is within your control (your partner’s maturity is one of those things)? But something you can understand is men and women are completely different in thinking, communicate, react and respond. Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus.

If you are still struggling to understand male-female relationships, this book (Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus - John Gray) is an ultimate guide to helped men and women to understand each other better.

I had personally read the book, and I think I have some review to share with you here:

Title: Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus - John Gray
Author: John Gray
Pages: 286

This book worth the price as it only selling at RM36.90 in any bookstore throughout the nation, invaluable resource for improving relationship. If you are still trying hard to understand your partner, after reading, you may have a clear understanding as why sometimes you felt resentful or neglected, because there’s a huge difference between men and women. It taught you how to control your anger, avoiding arguments, how to overcome miscommunication, give more love to your partner, differing emotional needs, respectful communication, asking for/receiving support and much more to be listed.

Some important points in the book:
Men believe in the adage that “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.”
Women, on the other hand, might say that “if it ain’t broke, upgrade it.”
Consequently, when a woman offers advice or criticism to a man, the man could misunderstand that she considers him inadequate.

Men like to be considered competent, whereas women like to be cherished.
This difference could result in an misunderstanding.
When a woman asks questions such as “Do you have enough cash?” or “Did you remember your umbrella?” she is treating others as she would like to be treated, but not as a man might like to be treated.

When men share their problems, they want solutions.
When women share their problems, they want empathy.
This difference results in situations in which a woman shares her problems, the man offers solutions, and the woman becomes angry because the man “is just not listening!”
The difference could also result in a man feeling blamed for a problem whereas in fact he is not.

A man often wants solitude when he is thinking about a problem.
A woman should be careful not to bother a man with questions at such a time.

A woman could have mood swings for no discernible reason.
A man should respect those mood swings and not take them personally.

When a man wants help, he asks. When a woman wants help, she doesn’t.
A woman could make a mistake by offering help when a man doesn’t ask.
On the other hand, a man could make a mistake by not sensing when a woman wants help.

Women count all gifts and favors equally, regardless of size or amount. Many small gifts and favors are better than one large, expensive gift or favor.

If a woman asks a man for a favor and the man hesitates, she should allow a few seconds for the hesitation rather than hastily interpreting that hesitation as a refusal.

This book is great, however with 286 pages, the book has more to offer that I’m unable to lists them all here. Since there’s going to be a holiday soon. Grab this book and start to read and blossom the love you have rather than struggling in your relationship if you are.

If you have read this book before, share your view. Thanks.
Once again, Happy New Year !