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You don’t have to be an expert in mind-reading to know a woman signs to dump you. If she feels that the relationship is not going to work out and is near the end, her action would often sends out naturally and in most cases you would be able to spot the signs and don’t get shocked if you get dumped because there are plenty of warning signs she had hinted you earlier.

If you are paying attention and noticed that she had the warning signs, would it be good or bad news for you? The next question would be, what should you do?

It would definitely be good news as you know you are going to be sentenced to death rather than shot dead immediately. Since you are fallen into negative zone of women, whatever you do will only make her “annoying”. I know how sucks it is, be prepared. Since you cannot change the cards you are to dealt, but you can turn things around on how you play the hand. You know her better, you think about it on how to save the relationship. If you choose to ignore, you will hurt harder when the reality sink in.

Here’s the signs she wants to dump you:

1. She’s avoiding talking to you face to face, your family and friends.
2. She never wants to answers your calls or calls you back when you missed call, never reply your email or sms.
3. She keeps giving you excuses when you ask her out.
4. She told you to go meet other woman or social more or hinted you to give up her.
5. She never wants to argue with you and seems afraid of you.
6. You did nothing wrong and she says you are “annoying”.
7. Earlier event, vacation plan she cancelled last minute or reluctant to take part.
8. She stop calling you “dear, sweetheart, baby” which she use to, instead calling your name.
9. She no longer wants to touch you and not interested to have sex with you.
10. She replaced your pictures with her own picture or none.
11. She no longer wants to hold your hand or kiss you in public.

Somehow I felt pity to some guys that they are trying so hard to changed themselves just to please their ex and hoping for second chance. Seriously, when a women says break up, she really mean it, she has thought of the break up for a period of time and she is very clear on what she need and do. No matter the breaks up  is better or worse, there is no way it will be the same again, no matter what you do and how much you change. 

Avoid repeating below and get moving on,

Stop Calling her, it’s hard but it will save you from prolonging you to start a new life, if she is willing to answer you calls, it will just cause more pain to you in long run.

Don’t send her Email, you may want her to still remember the existence of you, but you doesn’t know she will read or delete the email right away. Don’t be a fools, most likely you will not get any response and it just waste of time.

Stop stalking her account, the only place you can view her activity is through facebook or friendster, there’s no point doing that as she doesn’t belong to you anymore, what she do and who she with is no longer your responsible. Utilize this time to called up some friends and met new girl would be better.

Don’t tell her she make a mistake,  there’s always 2 side of a coins, no matter you are right or wrong, if you give her advice that you think is a mistake, she will not listen and will go ahead doing it, because you are no longer someone special and remember, you are not longer part of her life anymore.

Don’t beg for change,  it’s common that when a women breaks up with a men, the men would take all things seriously and promise to change, and take all her previous requests more seriously. It’s too late, you can’t turn back time, what is done is done. Accept the facts that she is no longer worth your efforts, learn and grow from the relationship to better serve your new girlfriend. 

Once again, when a relationship end, no matter what you do and change, it will never be the same again, the trust and scar is there.

Notes: This post is dedicated to all heartbreak friends and commentators in post - 10 years of relationship broke up sad sad story

Love is beautiful, Love is unconditional, Love is trust, Love is understanding, Love is loyal, Love is missing each other, Love is sharing, Love is sacrificing and Love is happiness. Is this what love is all about? Love is just 4 letter words that play us hard. Some said true love is “unconditional”, some said “Love is a temporary madness”, some said “Love is chemistry”. When love turned BAD? hatred? argument? and heartbreak? Love is sad, Love is painful, Love is miserable, Love is resentment, Love is grudges, Love is anger, Love is tears, Love is suffering. Love can be better if …

Love is about forgiveness.

“There is no love without forgiveness, and there is no forgiveness without love.”

Without forgiveness we can’t love. From the perspective of spiritual reality, the statements “I love you but don’t forgive you” and “I forgive you but I don’t love you” are impossibilities. Love and forgiveness go hand in hand. We can’t have one without the other.

Do you love him/her? Is it hard to say “I’m sorry”? Is it hard to “forgive” someone you love so much hurting you? I have been into that situation before, I have been hurt badly, I can’t breath, I am suffering, with so much mixed feeling of emotion and tears, I hated him so much. What is wrong here?

Someone hurting you so much, leaving you with another girl. You are in anger, You are suffering, You can’t sleep, You can’t eat, You can’t work and You CRY. Can you see anything wrong here? You are suffering. You can think of thousand reasons why he left you, it’s because you aren’t that hot, sexy, compatible, caring, understanding on and on. With so many reasons that you can think off, why can’t you think of forgiving him. Is it so hard to forgive? Think about it, You are suffering.

“The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.” - Gandhi

Well, it is often when something went wrong, it is someone to be blamed, in any case, you might be the victim. You may say “How can he did that to me, I am being so nice to him? I am innocent, I cant forgive him forever”. STOP that negative feeling. True forgiveness is not something we do for another person. Only the strongest person can forgive, it’s not about them, it’ about you, it’s ALL ABOUT YOU, it’s about letting go the hurt and hatred that stop you from becoming happy again. When you forgive a person, doesn’t mean you are wrong or lose. You don’t do it for them, you don’t have to think of are they worth to be forgiven, you are doing it for yourself. Don’t let the people who hurt you so much stay in your heart and mind, they are not worth/eligible to be placed there. Stop being a prisoner because of someone mistakes. Stop them prolonging you to suffer. Please! Forgive and let go and feel good about it.

My fellow readers and friends, I sincerely hope that this post will change your mind if you feel anger or hatred to someone that makes you sad today. Forgive the person and I guarantee you will feel good.

” If we really want to love we must learn how to forgive ” - Mother Teresa

PS: Something for laugh here, do you think Beckham should be forgiven by Victoria? (picture below)

Beckham and Victoria

First of all I felt sorry for the long post, however I tried to long story short but I do not want to miss any pieces that will be helpful to you in some ways and I hope this post can really give awareness of alcoholic for women. Men, we(women) know your trick, it’s too obvious. Come on, don’t take women for granted and ruins their life.

Somehow the idea of this post came out from this story which I stumble upon and saddened by the incident that alcoholic has ruins a girl happiness, yet it may be more worst than this story but I really hope that we(women) should always love ourself and don’t let our emotion control our mind and do something stupid. Here’s my share and please read, at the end of the story there are some facts about women and alcoholic.

Note: rephrase for better reading.
I am 21 this year and working as a cosmetics promoter. I have a boyfriend who is 27 and he is working as a salesman. He has been wonderful to me for many years. True, sometimes I lament slightly that I wasn’t able to be like some of my girlfriends who have rich boyfriend who can buy them anything they want, however, my love for him is much more than this kind of materialistic thoughts. We do quarrels at sometimes, but it is always him who give in and I really appreciate him. In fact, I learn how to cook so that in some way, I can show him how much I love him even though I’m scared of burning oil. After four years relationship, we plan to get married in Dec this year.

I have a manager and he is always very nice and helpful to me. In fact, he is always the one who tries to ‘protect’ me whenever I met up with difficulties at work. He’s like my friend. A few months back, he confessed his love to me and bought me a diamond necklace. He is 49 years old with two childrens. I treated him like a father and a good friend but never in my wildest dreams that I ever thought I would hear this from him. I was too stunned to reply and told him that I am getting married soon and it’s impossible between us. He saw my stunned reaction and quickly reassured me that he would not bring it up again.

However, a month before some incident happened and changed my life. I had a bad fight with my boyfriend in front of his family, while dressing up my wedding gown that I like most for photo-taking session and came out from the fitting room, my prospective mother-in-law stood up and disagreed with my choice and deemed it to be too revealing as it has a bare-back design. However, I insisted for that gown but my boyfriend actually asked me to change it for the sake of his mother. I got angry and said “it’s our wedding, not your mum” and I forced him to pay on the spot. He paid and I can feel that he is not happy, yet, he shouted me in front of his mum and shop assistants, he shouted me for not respecting his mum’s wishes. Never yet before he has been so hostile to me, I am really sad. All this while, his mum doesn’t really like me because she always lament that I psycho her son not to stay with his parents after marriage. This agreement of not staying with parent-in-laws had been decided between me and my boyfriend and not just me. In fact, her son tried to explain to her but she always feel that it is me. I had tolerated her for so long. 

I ran out with my gown and tears, many onlookers using strange expressions towards me, but I don’t care because I felt so disappointing and sad. I ran and sat alone in a deserted spot, thinking much and thought of cancelling the wedding and leave him. A moment later, he sms me looking for me. I was happy for his intention to worried about me but I couldn’t stand the incident happened in the shop. At this moment of time, I think of him(my manager), I called him and asked him out to talk to confide me. He knew something was wrong and he was very gentle and reassured it on the phone, within half an hour, he brought me to a nearby restaurant with quiet environment. He was very nice, despite the fact that I was still in my wedding gown and many onlookers gave us the ’strange’ look. He even told me not to care about how people looked. I really don’t know what came over me, while telling about my grievances with my boyfriend’s mum over the many months. I just drank and drank the red wine, the more I drank, the more I feel that all my bottled up feelings were released, my manager told me not to drink so much, but i don’t really care. Later, I asked him to bring me to nearby beach, that is the place where I always found peace when I am moody. I think I was heavily drunk. I really can’t think properly, inside the car, I saw the plane flying above me, how I wished that me and boyfriend can just fly off to a place far away from his mum. I don’t know what came over me. I just kept crying and in my drunken and emotional state. I actually mistook my manager as my boyfriend. The last thing I remembered was I hugged and I kissed him,  and ended up having sex.

When I woke up, I was shocked to see my manager beside me. I was hysterical, I HAD ACTUALLY DONE SOMETHING SO STUPID! I BETRAYED MY BOYFRIEND! I remembered my manager trying to calm me down, but I pushed him away, I was so angry with myself, why did I drink so much (a bottle??), why did I actually mistake him for my boyfriend? Was it because in my heart, my manager is someone who has provided me with so much sense of security? that it can actually develop into this kind of actions from me? I have so many questions but I can’t forgive myself.

For this past month, I don’t dare to meet my boyfriend. I feel that I have betrayed him. I felt so much guilt because of our religion, we were both very strict about the principle of staying chaste till our marriage but I ACTUALLY GIVEN IT TO MY MANAGER?! I’m very scared that I will get pregnant and caught any sexually transmitted disease because I think during that night, we had unprotected sex. If that happens, I think I won’t be able to live in this world. 

My boyfriend tried to contact me many times, but I avoided him and even lied to him I am in overseas. At the end, due to courages and firm decision to lessen my guilt and pain, I think he should deserved a better girl. Finally, I confronted everything to him, he cried and angry, shouted me on the phone and hung up. I did not angry him, because I think I deserved it. I know that I have done wrong and thats why I deserved it. Most probably, I will live with this guilt forever. I really regretted that alcohol has ruins my happiness life for this.
-END-

Taking advantage of women drunk has been played millions of times, yet it’s been going on. Sad but true, women get drunk faster than men, even both consume the same amount, regardless differences in body weight, a woman will attain a higher blood alcohol concentration than a man from the same amount of alcohol. This may be because women have lower levels of Alcohol Dehydrogenase (ADH), an enzyme involved in the metabolism of alcohol.

How the story ended so sadly because while he(the manager) is drinking right along with her, he was simply not getting as drunk, but she drank herself into a blackout stage and later he took advantage of the situation.

Women are more sensitive to alcohol and yet it posseseses risk of developing serious illnesses and an increased risk of heart disease, liver disease, ulcers, reproductive problems, osteoporosis, pancreatitis, memory loss, and other illnesses caused by substance and alcohol abuse. It’s more to count but what really do effect us women are menstrual disorders, which can lead to fertility problems if consume more and study showed that women who drink two to five alcoholic drinks each day, were 41 percent more likely to develop breast cancer than nondrinkers. To read more fact about women and alcoholic, here’s a site that I strictly recommend –> women and alcohol

Alcohol not just bring alot of troubles but also for men who drink and drive you may end your life and hurt the one you loved as well. Think about it, the christmas is near the corner, I believe some of you will be out for party, drink moderately and self control to end any tragic than is waiting for you.

Thanks and Merry Christmas !

Does that mean jerks finish last? We hear it all the time “He treated her like a queen, and she’s just heartless for dumping him”.  Why women dump a guy who is kind, considerate, generous, and willing to do just about anything for her? Does that mean woman want jerks who don’t open door for her, don’t buy her roses and do all the opposite she tells him? No, women wants an equal, caring partner and not an insecure nice guy.

Don’t get me wrong. I may not represent all the women out there and not all women walk over nice guys, there’s some and it’s not fair that all women get placed into that category. So, What’s wrong with Nice Guys? The biggest problem is that most Nice Guys are hideously insecure. Nice guy are just so anxious of being liked and love and they will do almost anything to gain acceptance and attention, rather than for the simply pleasure of giving. 

What Nice Guys thinks they did it right:.
1) They are inconfident and afraid she may dissapear or become attracted to someone else, so they cling to her always.
2) They are indecisive and always asking her to make the decisions. They afraid being blame if the decision was an unwise one.
3) They don’t have want, need and expect in the relationship. They just give in and rarely speak up when something bothers them because they fear that any kind of conflict might spell the end of the relationship.
4) They claimed that she is a difficult person and should be thankful to him by saying “no one will ever love her as much as I do.”  just because they think they will never meet anyone as special as she is.
5) They believe that he is the best person otherwise his insecurities will overrun him with jealousies and fear.
6) They thinks that by “giving in with all efforts and sacrifice”, it will make him a better, more lovable person. He thinks it will give him a sense of accomplishment, and that she will appreciate and love him more.

After going through the 6 points above, if you are woman, do you prefer such a Nice Guy? I always believe that “No woman will leave a man if he is such a nice guy”, there must be a reason behind and yet the reason is pretty clear sometimes. Although Nice Guys have his temper and do quarrel, but at the end they will do whatever in his power to give in and change, but the more he is willing to change and give in, it makes women felt guilty, demanding and selfish and in turn they(women) hated themselves.In such reaction, this is where the decision of ending the relationship come from. They need someone who can speak for themseleve and stand up to their deman. The ultimate truth here is that Nice Guys just don’t love themselves, women need someone who’ll love himself more. In order to truly love someone else, you must first love yourself. Let’s be very truthful now. Stop saying “I’m such a nice guy, why did she has to leave me “. Hope you really get what it mean.