“Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your heart or burn down your house, you can never tell.”
If you have an argument with your loved one just now or you had gone through a bitter relationship before. You may know that LOVE is full of joy, sorrow, sadness and happiness. Perhaps, appreciate what you have now and continue to blossom the love because the story below is a 10 years relationship ended up with plenty of tears and bitterness that only the one really experience it can feel the pain that carry him to the rest of his life.
The real story is rephrased by Sharen Sia from the original source for better reading: source greyshadow reader
I have been together with Clara (not a real name) for 10 years. We stay together for the past 5 years. This coming year we are planning to tie our knot and busy preparing for our wedding, less than 3 months time we are going to be husband and wife. My dream will come true and I hope that Clara and I can proceed to next level of life after marriage. I always wanted the best for her, the wedding decoration and arrangement is within her preference that I have strive very hard to fulfill. What could be happier to see your wife to become the happiest bride on that day. While eager to wait for the wedding day to arrived, yesterday she came back and told me she wanted to break up with me because she falls in love to another guy. I couldn’t have believed that this could happen to me and my heart is so aching as if was being torn to thousand pieces.
I don’t have intention to write this down at first, but yesterday I dreamt of her. I couldn’t hold back my tears that I woke up and cried in the darkness. It’s really difficult to put down 10 years of relationship and carry on with my life, the sweet and sour moment we spent together keep flashing in my mind, her pretty smile still remained fresh in my mind that I could never seen again, I am useless, I am hopeless, I can’t do anything because her heart was never mine again and have changed.
Actually, I did not hate the third person in our relationship; I hated her for not loving me anymore, if she loved me, there is no way the third person can come in and succeeded to take her away from me.
I sit down and think for long hours, our relationship, reason I could think of is that personalities between both of us are different, and she’s an outgoing person while I am not. Within this 10 years thing changed a lot, we try to change ourselves to adapt each other. She started to hang out lesser while I changed myself to be a better man. I use to think changing for her is to show my love to her and I feel worthy. I am bad temper guy; I use to frown in front of her most of the time, due to different personalities as she always went out and come home late. It’s inevitable that I would feel displeasure. Unfortunately, during break up, she uses this as a reason not to see me suffer again. What can I say as loving her has no regret in my life.
In the end, I wishfully hope that I can carry on with my life and recover as soon as possible.
A day gone, a day without Clara in my life, returning home has never been the same, she had cleared all her belonging, remaining left was just her toiletries stuff in bathroom, nothing much of her belonging can be seen. Cloth and shoe closet are emptied. After seeing all her belonging was emptied, I started to feel down again. Recall back the good times when she open the shoe closet and wearing her shoe while I waited her to go out for dinner, all this remained a memory that will never repeat again. The worst part is how I am going to face the difficulty to sleep tonight. Thinking back this afternoon at workplace, I wasn’t so sad during those period, but after listening to a sad song, once again I couldn’t hold back my tears, I tell myself, please, please don’t cry in here. My heart is so sour and aching that the incident still hunts me and wouldn’t let go. I was pleased that working can let me get off the sadness for a while. While the sadness still on, I still need face another difficulty to inform all my colleagues about the cancellation of the wedding, GOD, how should I tell them and did I tell you that she work in the same department with me? Yet again I still need to face a lot of relatives who already know we are going to get married. My life is like falling from high to the bottom of the floor, I felt painful, suffering, suffocated, stress and depressed. I am a living corpse. I feel more suffered than dying.
Two weeks has past, I slowly started to accept the fact and reality, the feeling of loneliness and feeling of not going home still there. I hate being alone in the living room, going back to an empty house, no one to talk to, watching TV alone till midnight and doesn’t feels like going to bed. Seeing the bed and sleeping alone reminds me about those days with her. I hate it and wanted to cry out loud, cry out all the loneliness and sadness out, but I couldn’t because it already impossible to getting her back as her heart has changed to another guy. Don’t know why recently I hate her, I hate her to disappoint me, I hate her for being so cruel to me and I hate her for not loving me. The hate has however make me to have a courage to get a new girlfriend, but I know this will only psychology mend my broken heart, to gain back what I lost and look for a replacement but I can’t be so selfish that I shouldn’t be so unfair to another person. But once again, I am feeling very lonely; my life is full of sorrow as if I am living in a dark and lonely planet.
The mixed feeling between miss and hate is killing me, hate in the heart, but other side of me still hope that she would never leave me. As torturing as I was thinking to reap my heart and take it out away from inside.
I wish I could take a long vacation, getting away from this sad place, but seeing a lot of workload on hand doesn’t allow me to do so. Every now and then, when going to work reminds me of those old days both of us taking LRT (Terminal Train) together, during lunch hour reminds me of those old days having lunch together. Those memories keep flashing in my mind I can’t forget. Maybe we have been staying together for 5 years, she has become so dominant in my life and already been part of my life, I still haven’t ready yet to change, I don’t have a direction, I’m just like a boat sailing in the middle of the sea and lost direction and don’t know where to head to. Tomorrow is another day, how am I going to take it and feel sad again.
Loving you in my life has never regret.
-END-
Thank you for reading and I hope that this true story could help you to appreciate what you have now and love the one you love and treasure he/she.
Entries (RSS)
November 17th, 2007 at 12:33 pm
[...] Purple Fly Community added an interesting post on 10 years of relationship broke up ! Sad sad story … [...]
November 17th, 2007 at 2:22 pm
I guess it’s normal to have resentment and when galz change their heart, they can come up with the most absurd reasons.
November 17th, 2007 at 2:29 pm
Life goes on, no matter what. Just a matter of time.
November 17th, 2007 at 3:27 pm
dude, as cliche as this sounds, if she is meant to be yours and will come back, better. If she wasn’t then she will never be yours. Maybe it’s better now broken up than divorce later… sometimes its easier to accept pain now than prolonged suffering… cheer up. I’ve kinda been there. My past relationship was 2 yrs long and I was cheated on as well….
It’s hard but life goes on…
November 17th, 2007 at 3:27 pm
it’s like im reading about myself.
November 17th, 2007 at 4:26 pm
I can feel the pain, but time will heal everything. A decade of relationship is not easy to let go. Just be strong and never give up to your life. There’s always a better one ahead. Do something you always wanted without her, be yourself and see the bright side of the life. Your family and friends still there to care about you.
God Bless You!
November 17th, 2007 at 11:12 pm
Hey. I really hope that you can get over it soon. I really hope so cos everyone has at least went through this once in their lifetime, including me. It’s really painful and in the end like many have said time will heal the wound. Though the scar is still there, but in the end life goes on and you are the only one who can help yourself. Socialize, do sports, anything that can get your mind out of the sadness. Jiayou!!!
November 17th, 2007 at 11:17 pm
stay strong dude. like chocolate said, i too can feel the pain as i read the entry. don’t let this slow you down, just keep looking forward
November 18th, 2007 at 3:00 pm
Stay strong. We can move on, but we can never forget.
November 19th, 2007 at 2:30 am
That’s a sad story. I am into that situation but not that long, your years in months. But I guess no matter how long the relationship, it’s still the same, ended up with tears.
Love is a game, if you wanna play the game, there’s a chances that it will game over. Just reset the game and start another one, life still goes on. If she is really that worst and cruel, karma is there to take care.
Be strong and a better one is ahead … always there someone worth treasure.
November 21st, 2007 at 2:07 pm
Huwaaaa !!!! saddest story I’ve ever read..man.pity that man…If it happens to me, surely I’ll be mad and lunatic. However, as a man we must accept everything that happen in our life positively.
This time I’m just finishing my final exam..hahaha, can’t wait until the next semester =D
November 23rd, 2007 at 1:57 am
Time is a great healer..
December 1st, 2007 at 4:44 am
i’ve been like that before… bitter, resentful, no spark in my life… its been 6 months since the breakup but i still feel the pain of leaving my precious 4 yr r’ship behind in a blink of an eye. in my case, he doesn’t want to listen to my explanation of some exchanges of text messages between me and this guy, although its a bit dirty, but we’re just playing around and teasing each otehr. he thinks that i’m the baddie and drops the bomb. until now, he still doesn’t want to listen and leave me like that. i understand how it feels leaving a precious relationship so sudden. it’s true that time heals, just hope that we are strong enough to keep going. life is too short for us to wallow around and let all the happiness pass by.
December 9th, 2007 at 10:52 pm
Dear 10 years of relationship broke up sad sad story,
Thanks for the compliment and I appreciate your valuable act.
nice day
Dear Acrix,
Gals can be the loveliest creature in the world, but sometimes when guys don’t appreciate us the most, we will want their attention.
Dear Jason,
Happy to have you here as you are very optimistic, I guess!
Have a nice day!
Dear Estee,
Thank you so much for your motivation and I appreciate it! It’s difficult to take the first move to end the nasty relationship, however as wat you’d mentioned here “its easier to accept pain now than prolonged suffering”. Thanks for the failure relationship which actually made up wiser and grow to the higher extents. Gals power rocks!!
Dear Ivan,
Thanks for reading the post and I sincerely wish that you have get rid of the past relationship. Have a nice day!
December 11th, 2007 at 10:11 pm
Dear Chocolate,
Thanks for the motivation. Time will heal everything and you are right: Life still goes on with- or without- her/him. Appreciate our life and life is irreplaceable.
Dear Tianhong,
I like your comment. The “scar’ was actually make us grow stronger and tougher. Not to mention the extraordinary experience we had gone through. Jia You to u also!!
Dear Satkuru,
Now we’ve grow stronger! Thanks for dropping by and hope to see ya around.
Dear Liza S,
Thank you so much for the motivation. Stronger than ever now!! have a nice day!
Dear Kenngoh,
Thanks for the motivation and I guess you are stronger than ever. Nice day to you!
December 11th, 2007 at 10:17 pm
Dear AzmiHadi,
Thank you for dropping me a message here. Glad that you’d finished the exams now. How’s the exam? Confident to pass all the subjects? Any plans for the holidays? Life is full of experience, that’s all about LIFE. Weird yet interesting.
Dear Aayush,
Thank you so much!
Dear Aymarr,
Hi! I have a phrase to share with you here: we can’t erase the past but what we could do is make the future more meaningful. Enjoy the life to the maximum and be chilled! Thanks
March 27th, 2008 at 4:53 pm
while reading this sad story, i suddenly feel like i’m reading my own story. The only difference is that you are married but I’m with a little baby of 2 yrs old. Some personal advices:
1. woman will not stay because you do this and that for her just to keep her with you!
2. all the men out there including myself, do not regret when everything is too late to be cured. you should constantly look at yourself before start blaming the women for not loving you. problem is not happen because of one person. look back how you have treated her when she still love you the most.
3. when a women’s heart change, nothing you can do anymore. You may successfully keep at your side for a short moment but is she going to be happy, are you HAPPY?
4. I have to agree with you, you feel so empty when you reach home. All of sudden, so much changes happen in the house from 2 occupants reduce to just 1 person, that’s you. I’ve been there. I used to sleep in the living room on my sofa with all the lights switch ON. Constantly wake in the midnight hoping she is there staring at you. The truth is, the moment she decided to leave, there is no more turning back for her.
5. Used this experience to further enhance your feeling for relationship in future. Think of the problems that caused your relationship. Do not repeat it ANYMORE in future.
6. Lastly, let go your sad memories and start to work on your new life.
BROTHER
April 2nd, 2008 at 7:41 am
This feels just like what I’m going through now. It really sucks, but I have decided to try to take control of my emotions the best I could.
Do you have an update? How are things going now that it’s been a few months?
April 2nd, 2008 at 11:30 pm
Dear Brother,
Thanks for the motivation! you really outshine my darkness!
Dear jason,
So happy to cya here, actually the writer has gone through her darkness of age and embracing the joyous of new life. thanks!!
April 3rd, 2008 at 6:45 pm
Be strong my friend….
The only thing u can do is live for a better life and prove urself you are someone worth for marrying…
April 22nd, 2008 at 2:23 am
the feeling is suck, really suck but trust me! few year later you don’t even remember how she look like.. thats life..life is short, don’t waste your time looking backward..
May 18th, 2008 at 2:22 pm
I know your pain very well …. when through it 10 years ago and again now. I was never bad to this guy, he was not there when I need him the most. And he just let me go like if I was an old pair of shoes. Not to say I let another guy do that to me but, seeing him 10 years later on the same week that we broke up just killed me again. After 10 years I still love him, and the only thing I want for him is to be happy with who ever he is with and what ever he is doing with his life. I know it is hard, but be strong… I know of the dark place you are in, I have been there at least 2 times in the 10 years. At first it was very hard, I felt like a walking corps… then after 8 years I was fine… I accepted the fact that we each moved on. I only wanted him to be happy. But, when i saw him 8 years after we broke up, he was crying, I tell you “It just killed me” really really killed me… as I did before is work on myself and now I have 2 degrees to my name. I am so happy with my degrees, it makes the pain a little easy. If I would have seen him any other time then the week of our brake up I think I would have never flipped out and gone back to the dark place. But with a little help of anti depression medication, family and friends I worked through it. Not to say that I am totaly there yet, but I know there is a silver lining on the next cloud of dreams. You will meet some one new, and she will love you so much that you will be so happy. Clara will always hold a part of your hart, but as time passes you will forgive her. I tell you when you finaly for give her you will be free. I know I have done it 2 times out of 5 times seeing him in 10 yrs. And I know this time I have forgiven him faster then before, because if he had any hart he would not have shown up 10 years to the week of our brake up. It just goes to show that love hurts and it is harder to forgive someone that you know cares for you but not that much.
The best advice to give you is work on yourself and get some help from your doctor, friends and family.
June 3rd, 2008 at 10:55 pm
[...] is blind Listening to Tiffany’s If Love is Blind while reading about this story just makes me feel so down, so [...]
June 11th, 2008 at 2:42 pm
i am goign through the same thing right now, this is the 3rd time in 2 years my misses is unsure about our love and i think this time it is the end, she has OCD so it is really making it hard for her to see the big picture anymore, i just wished she realised that you cant keep the spark forever, there is more to love, needing them everyday, wanting to hear there voice, touching them, hearing there voice.. i dont know how i can live without her nobody will be like her and i was only 6 months from propsoing myself, she is goign to make a mistake and i dont want to loose her. i am trying to be strong but she is my life and i am hers, she feels becuase there isnt a spark she doesnt love me the same anymore, i am worried i will do something stupid becuase i dont want to picture a life without her..
June 15th, 2008 at 2:23 am
[...] Notes: This post is dedicated to all heartbreak friends and commentators in post - 10 years of relationship broke up sad sad story [...]
September 1st, 2008 at 4:00 am
hi mate iv just split from my girl of 6 years just a few days ago im so sad and angry at the same time i feel as if im going down a big black hole and no one to save me she has a little girl which i brought up as my own she is six years old and full of life i love her so much and my ex is carrying my baby of six month she’s due in december i know i still love her very much, but after all the things weve been through and came out the other side i havint a clue whats going to happen but if god is listening send down a prayer please. dont worry mate 10 yers is a long time but remember time heals everything….god bless ,from kirky